43. Now in English...

Yes... Finally in English... my first attempt... and no... this is not a clever political opinion from inside Pyongyang.

We hear all the time that life is about overcoming difficulties and how fun challenges are... bullshit! This is as far as I go having fun with a challenge... writing a stupid text in English trying to sound smart and witty in a language that is not my mother tongue... Risky I know... but why would we complicate our life more? Am I the only one finding it so difficult to live? 

I don't know if this comes with a middle age crisis at the age of 37, if I am just depressed or if this was in fact my big, true love that rejected me ... the thing is... it fucked me up completely... I will call it my North Korea period.

The bomb was already dropped on me... it wasn't even tested first... it just exploded and destroyed any sign of life I had... I was forced to join this zombie trend that you see on Netflix... I am that zombie that wanders around for his daily duties whilst wonders around his memories of a true living past.

Just like Kim Jong... I keep smiling every time I can to hide the lack reasons to smile... it's the positive energy slavery era...

Good energies attract good energies... they say... think positive... don't be negative... he used to say... just smile!

I have been given the task of thinking on 3 positive things, every morning, for the day ahead... So you wake up, feel the usual body aches due to lack of quality on your sleep as you are stressed, you feel tired as you didn't sleep enough, you need to run to get ready to get the packed tube on time to be at your work, that you need so you can pay your bills, on time... and smile because you can see, you can hear and you can speak... there you go... 3 positive things... Just repeat it every morning and you will be cured!

You can be very, very, very creative and make up 3 different ones... be grateful to wake up and don't have your boyfriend by your side meaning that the bed is all yours, have dinner without any manners as nobody is watching you and become more spiritualised as you don't have sex at all... you just need to be creative!... the positivity is everywhere. He rejected you blocking any possible communication?... No... he is just naturally helping you go nuts...! I always heard crazy people are the happiest! Positivity again!... I can't help it!

Fake it until you make it... if this works... one day I might smile because I really feel like and not because I want to get rid of the negativity justified by destroyed memories of a painful love as democratic as North Korea... I didn't choose to explode it as I don't choose to stay on it... 

That's life... on a self-war.

Kisses galore,

PM